Stepping out into your own backyard.

The wind was up, the morning sky was clear and the flags that dotted the shoreline moved dramatically with the wind as it came off the bay. The wind, which my daughter says makes me sound old when I talk about it, really doesn’t have much to do with anything except it was part of a wonderful opportunity to sit on a dock and catch up with an old friend.

We talked about what we were doing at the moment and about what we were reading — Einstein came up because it was one of the current reads. We shifted our conversation to current events and our shared thoughts, as well as thoughts on those who share thoughts. One of us, and I am not sure who, suggested people need to step out into their own backyard. It struck us as something so profound that we joked that it would make a great title for a book. The conversation eventually faded into what was a great cottage weekend.

The conversation had been wide ranging and I can’t put my finger on what triggered the fledgling book title and I’m still trying to comprehend its meaning. I know there is something to it but I’m not entirely sure what, so I asked my friend iamGPT what he/she/it had to say —

Me: How would you figuratively interpret this sentence, Stepping out into your own backyard?

ChatGPT: The phrase "stepping out into your own backyard" can be figuratively interpreted in several ways, depending on the context. Here are a few possible interpretations:

1. Exploring Familiar Ground:

• It can symbolize exploring familiar or personal territory, suggesting taking a closer look at what you already have or know. It encourages discovering or appreciating the resources, opportunities, or beauty that are already available to you.

2. Starting with Small, Manageable Steps:

• It can imply beginning with something small and manageable before taking on bigger challenges. Just as stepping into your backyard is a modest step compared to venturing far from home, it suggests starting close to home or within your comfort zone.

3. Personal Growth and Reflection:

• The phrase can signify a journey of personal growth and self-reflection. Your "backyard" symbolizes your personal life or inner self, and stepping out into it suggests taking time to reflect on and nurture your own growth and well-being.

4. Taking Initiative and Ownership:

• It can also mean taking initiative and ownership of your life and circumstances. Just as you have control over your backyard, it implies taking charge of your environment, decisions, and actions.

5. Finding Joy in Simplicity:

• Lastly, it can represent finding joy and contentment in simple, everyday experiences. Your backyard is a place of familiarity and comfort, and stepping out into it can suggest appreciating the simple pleasures and moments in life.

Each of these interpretations offers a different perspective on the figurative meaning of the phrase, emphasizing aspects like familiarity, personal growth, initiative, and simplicity.

iamGTP offered very uplifting set of interpretations I admit, but it still didn’t feel right — maybe it was the context of our discussions that doesn’t have me piling on the self-improvement and wellbeing bandwagon. As I reflect on what we were talking about I kept coming back to the word “accountability”.

The metaphor of stepping out into your own backyard came about because we recognized much of what is being said and done today seems to lack any accountability in terms of taking responsibility or being held accountable — there seems to be a growing trend to relinquish any responsibility or accountability in many things and let it fall elsewhere. Opinion supersedes facts, language is misleading and sensationalized and more often than not, is allowed; what is said and done today is forgotten tomorrow. An easy example is listening to the weather forecast and the storm of the century that never materializes — start scratching and most places be it governments, institutions or the person in the grocery line complaining (pick a topic) and you will see a growing lack of accountability.

The idea of stepping out into your own backyard was to suggest more people need to reflect on themselves and take accountability, and metaphorically speaking, create a nice back yard — a back yard that is well kept, inviting, includes a biodiversity that is healthy. A retreat for yourself and others.

I should mention that ownership is not the same as accountability. You can own a backyard, but unless you are accountable for it, it will become the final resting spot for rusty appliances and broken bicycles. And figuratively speaking, that is not a nice place to spend your time (for that matter, it isn’t even a great place in the literal sense).

That day with the wind, on the dock, involving a pithy little quip illustrated a realization of a growing lack of character that’s happening all around us. Take the Canadian Women’s Olympic Soccer team for instance. They got caught cheating as they tried to spy on the other teams using a drone — and they appealed the consequences when they got caught. Sure, it was the coaching staff based on what we know so far, but by the nature of the game you are a team, so everyone owns it. We are Canadian for fuck’s sake, what exactly is going on? Let’s take some accountability and ask ourselves who we want to be?

Let’s leave whether character really matters another day to discuss — there’s definitely a solid camp for “the end justifies the means” so it’s not as clear cut as some would think. For the record, I believe character is crucial for long term success and happiness with accountability being a big one in that regard. Call me old fashioned (something that comes with talking about the wind I suppose).

Please let me know if I am ever falling short.

iamgpe

PS: Thanks to Miketopia and iamGPT for helping me collect my thoughts.

The best question you can ask... ever.

“What question should I be asking but haven’t?”

There are instances where a culture of “don’t ask; don’t tell” exists or people who hold information back for the perception of control and power but in general, with no malicious intent, most people operate under the simple contract of “asked and answered” — you get what you ask for.

Critical understanding is a result of asking questions, and particularly those questions you don’t know to ask — eventually you exhaust the questions that come innately to you so it’s imperative to surround yourself with people who ask the questions you didn’t think of — or better yet ask them what you should be asking.

In the same vein, another very good question is” What am I missing?” Just make sure you aren’t just talking to yourself.

iamgpe

A series on leadership — insight three

Recently I thought I had reached a level of wisdom that I could offer thoughts on a number of things in a blog; one of which was Leadership. In my brief overview on the topic, I said this:

Leadership is defined when times are difficult: with vision, decision making, and ownership. This applies to character for that matter.

It struck me that maybe it was impossible to define leadership in a single sentence, and even if I did accurately hit on the three key elements, it’s obviously a very deep subject which warrants more than a sentence. With this in mind, and the need to explore a very important topic further, I thought I’d share some insights from those leaders I have known over the years. I suspect most will fall into what I’ve pointed out as decision making, with vision and ownership being figurative bookends. As I make my way, hopefully I will find something I didn’t pay enough attention to — a reminder that reflection is a powerful tool.

insight three

Question:

I'm currently thinking a lot about the topic of leadership and there are one or maybe two questions in this context that I'm not really getting anywhere with. Since you are writing on this topic in your blog, I thought I would write you and ask you the two questions that are currently bothering me:

1) How do I find out if I am a leader, or if I have the potential to be one? (And here I explicitly mean leader as opposed to boss).

2) How do I find out if I can handle the responsibility that a leader has? And I don't mean responsibility in the sense of personnel responsibility here, but the responsibility to make the world (somewhat) better as a leader.

… maybe your thoughts are suitable for a blog post. Because I think others might have these questions too.

Reply:

Ok, I've spent some time thinking about this so I can offer something constructive...

First of all you can accomplish anything you want, and remember everything (including leadership) is a journey — and as you know, that's where you actually learn something. So definitely don't talk yourself out of taking any opportunity and jump all over what is being offered.

I think it may be better to not look at "Leadership” as a binary thing: I am a leader/I am not a leader, but more as a spectrum of bad to great (and you don't even need a title)... you are actually a leader right now. I think the question is how do I become a great leader that will make a difference? Two general considerations come to mind... 1) you need to be at a level that you can influence organizational change and 2) rally people (direct and indirect) around your vision/plan and get them to make it happen. A leaders job isn't to do it but rather rally others to do it.

Although if you are really good you don't need #1 but it makes it easier for sure; check out the book The Leader Who Had No Title by Robin Sharma (https://youtu.be/gqvmd8j6v9M )

If you want any career advancement and ability to lead change, you need people management experience because the only way to get it is to do it... you need the experience of hiring, developing, promoting and terminating just to develop a baseline (in bad times is preferable). It is the only try way to determine if you want to manage teams or would rather be an individual contributor.

The legacy of a good/great leader is in the people they touch and the teams they develop — that's how you change the world; one person at a time. I always took the philosophy that I will try to help a person take my job because my thinking was if I could do that, then I was doing my job.

My advice would be to signal to your boss you are excited about the opportunity and want to go for it — and then become a sponge on the topic of "leadership" (read, courses, a mentor). Buckle up and enjoy the ride!

I like Simon Sinek... a bit of a thought leader https://youtu.be/UZTyvbmW92M

I hope this has helped, and as I say, I would go for it and enjoy the ride.

I received a heart felt reply. It struck me afterward that I had forgotten something; I will follow up on my initial reply but I think it’s so important I will share — “Great Leadership is as much a Philosophy as it is a Journey”

iamgpe

PS: with regards to the original question it has been edited to remove sections to respect privacy, and my response has been edited slightly to correct bad grammar and punctuation.

image: anna-samoylova-unsplash