As a reminder — your agenda isn't necessarily everyone else's...

The world of late has reminded me of a "coachable moment" I offered up a lifetime ago... or at least it feels like a lifetime ago.

He stuck his head into my office with concern written all over his face; with all decorum set aside, he needed me to look at an email he just sent and wanted my feedback asap — he had a deliverable that was due.

Putting aside my own deliverable, I took advantage of this coachable moment and simply said, "You know, your poor planning and your urgent agenda is not my agenda". I then went on to offer a perspective on planning, time management and my thoughts on how to engage support. I told him I would read his email as soon as I could but he'd have to be patient. I then politely kicked him out of my office because I had a deadline (plus something else on my to-do list).

This "coachable moment" covers many areas as I alluded to, but recent events have me focusing on patience and the truism — "your agenda isn't necessarily everyone else's". The patience to wait is something evaporating by the minute with this app rich world but the truism is alive and well (maybe more than ever). Even when agendas do align, there are always the influencers that are Murphy's best friends (timing, a bigger boss, mother-nature, and the randomness of the universe) — the chances of you waiting are much greater than you not waiting.

There is a need to become comfortable with being patient, and more importantly, ensure you are being productively patient.

In other words, use this waiting time to be productive with other things (particularly something new). Of course you will use some of this time to influence what you are waiting for but in most cases that doesn't take more than a half hour — so do others things. Yes you are waiting for the "phone to ring", but you are also investigating a new business venture, taking a course, writing a blog, or networking to build your opportunity funnel. Being productively patient will have you increasing the number of agendas that you have on the go and developing out the number of things you need to be patient with. Because the more things you have on the go, the greater the chance the phone will ring.

Murphy will probably have them all ring at the same time.

iamgpe

Moments — Are we letting people do too much for us?

If you ever get to drive a Subaru BRZ you will find it is a very tight car to drive — the steering responses quickly and so do the brakes, and the clutch is nice and smooth.

So when it isn't, you should appreciate something is wrong.

Recently I was driving along minding my own business when suddenly the steering wasn't as tight, and the brakes were just a little off — and at that moment, in classic guy style, I kept driving with the working assumption it would self-correct. As my tolerance waned for the "self-correcting to happen" I finally pulled over (just in case there was actually something wrong). I suppose in hindsight I really wasn't surprised I had a flat rear tire because as I said, BRZ's are tight driving cars. What surprised me was what happened next.

As I was assessing my options I said to myself, "I guess I should call a tow truck" — a moment later, I physically stopped myself and started an internal discussion that went something like this.

• Why would I call a tow truck when I don't need a tow?
• I have a spare and all the tools to change the tire myself.
• I can do it in a tenth of time it will take someone to get here.
• Other than laziness, is there any reason not to do it myself?
• I'm glad it's not really cold and it's sunny.
• It's a pain in the ass to empty the trunk.

It had been a while since I had changed a tire so I wasn't very efficient but it was changed in twenty minutes; I then headed off to track down a new tire. It's a fun little story to be sure, but what really resonated with me is why my first reaction would be to call a tow truck (when I obviously could do it myself)?

I appreciate the premise of "why do it yourself, when you can get someone else to do it?", and I also understand that it is "impossible to know how to do everything so you will need people's help"...  as well as the argument regarding opportunity cost and "how net/net it'll be more profitable to get someone else to do it".

But now I can't help ask the question, "When does it actually become detrimental to have someone else do it for you?"

I'm not suggesting I have any answers to this question (and frankly I only thought of it because I got a flat tire), but is does create the opportunity for a fine discussion (particularly if there is wine involved) —

• Are you getting someone else to do it because you're lazy?
• Is it something you just can't do or learn to do?
• Are you spending money you "can't afford to spend" to have someone do it?
• Are you denying your own development by letting someone else do it?
• Are you simply concerned with the consequences?
• Et Cetera, et cetera...

For me the biggest consideration is about "waiting". Are you putting yourself on hold because of someone else? 

Waiting is not active, and if you are not active, you are not getting things done. And if you aren't getting things done, you are not going to reach your goals. The waiting place is the worst place to be, and even a worst habit to develop because in the end you will find yourself always waiting to get something done (and in the end accomplish nothing).

As I mentioned I really don't have any answers to this other than it seems I hate to wait.

iamgpe